It’s difficult to watch a parent’s health decline, and Whitney Port is speaking out about the heavy weight caregiving places on a family. 

On a recent episode of her podcast, With Whit, the 41-year-old former reality star cried as she shared an update on her mom, Vicki. Over the last few years, Vicki has faced cognitive decline and required daily support. 

“We’re having a hard time right now,” Port said. “We’re trying to figure out her care situation and what’s best for her.” 


The Guilt of the ‘Sandwich Generation’

Millions of adults are caught in the “sandwich generation,” raising their own children while simultaneously managing an older parent’s health. It’s a balancing act that leaves caregivers feeling stretched thin and overwhelmed by guilt. 

For Port and her four siblings, the biggest hurdle has been finding a way to keep their mom safe at home without burning themselves out. They ultimately turned to Care.com’s Senior Care Advisor service to hire professional at-home help, but getting Vicki to accept the assistance took time. 

“Originally, when we had care for her, she was very, very resistant to it. I’m honestly in a pretty bad way with it at the moment,” she continued. “I think part of my helplessness feeling right now is because I’m not there knowing what’s going on every day. But I then think about if she were to come live with me, could I handle that? And I don’t know. And that’s where I’m at right now. Because she can’t be on her own.”

In an Instagram post, Port shared a clip from the episode and reminded viewers in the caption that not having all the answers is normal and OK. 

“There are so many moments in caring for a parent when you just don’t know what the right thing to do is,” she wrote. “You want to fix it. You want to make it better. And sometimes you simply can’t.”

Managing the Heartbreak

The family’s journey started about a year ago after they noticed Vicki beginning to isolate and experience memory slips. Having lost their dad in 2013, Port and her siblings were left to figure out this new chapter on their own.

Today, Port is working through the heartbreak of becoming a parent to her own mother. 

“It’s more like I’m the mother and she’s the child,” she told People in 2025. “The dynamic has reversed now. It has forced me to reflect on how much she’s given us. And it has made me want to show up for her so much more.”

Even so, the grief of losing their old bond is a heavy burden to carry. “But it’s sad every day that I can’t necessarily have full-on deep conversations about everything that’s going on in my life like we used to,” she added. “There’s like a little hole there.”

Making Space to Cry 

After watching her own mother sacrifice her well-being to care for her husband and parents, Port knew she couldn’t ignore her own needs while juggling so much. 

“I watched my mom be a caregiver. I watched my mom take care of my dad, take care of my grandparents, and, honestly, I watched how much it tore her apart,” Port told People. “And I didn’t want that to be the case for me or my siblings. I didn’t want us to sacrifice our entire lives and jobs and livelihoods.”

To survive the hardest days, Port said she borrowed a strategy from Real Housewives of Orange County (RHOC) star Heather Dubrow: scheduling time for emotional breakdowns. 

“I have to allow myself to have these cathartic moments of release, but then pick myself up and do the things that I need to get done,” she said. “It’s creating a space and time for myself, because the more that we shut it down, the more they’re just gonna show up in our own personal sickness.”





Source link